Here is An UNSCRIPTD Journey written by Tom Callahan:
I’ve changed. My interests, my appearance, how I speak, you name it, I’ve changed.
One year ago, I quit my job in Chicago, hopped on a plane to London, and had no idea what I was doing. I took a two-month solo trip to Europe, and once I got back, I was going to drive to LA. This was the first time in a while where I had a “plan” more than a few weeks out. But that was it. My plan was go to Europe, then go to LA. I did not want to let anyone or anything affect my plan. For the first time, I had the want, the passion, and the means to do something that I actually wanted to do. During those couple months, I did what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it, and never looked back. I stopped doing things that I didn’t want to do, stopped caring about what others thought was the “right” thing to do, and it changed my whole outlook on life. When I got back from my trip, the first thing I did in NYC was getting the word “Go” tattooed on my left forearm. For me, it was something I knew I wanted for months, and if you’ve seen it, it is not a perfectly drawn design. I drew it. My handwriting looks like comic sans. It wasn’t meant to be perfect. Life’s not perfect, but you still need to Go.
I go through some of the highest of highs, but have also had some pretty deep lows in the past year. I need to be surrounded by people, but I also need times of solidarity. All of these emotions have been within my control. If I felt like shit, it was my choice. I never let someone else’s problems affect my mood. Selfish? Maybe, but like I said, I’m not perfect, far from it.
I have fears; the biggest of which is commitment. Again, if you know me, I’ve always been afraid of commitment; where I want to live, what I want to do, girls. I feel like when I make a choice, that I am locked into it forever. It’s a silly thought, and I have overcome it, but commitment is by far my worst fear. I moved to Los Angeles to get away from this fear. Rational? Maybe. Did it work? Nope! I’m just as afraid as ever about everything. The only way I know how to cope with that fear is to keep living my life one moment at a time. I distract myself from this fear by creating diversions. Diversions that I currently have passion for. Again, if you know me, when I’m passionate about something, I will go all out on it. I’ll do whatever I need to do to make it happen. This used to be football. It used to be all I cared about. Right now, those diversions are travel, tacos, Sunday Porch Club, and comedy. It’s how many of you know me, and right now, that truly is the real me. It is my personality. Will it last forever? F*** if I know. But right now, that’s what I like, and I am going to do it until I stop liking it. One more time, if you know me, you know that once I do lose my passion for something, it’s very hard for me to gain it back.
I can’t honestly say that I have any idea of what I am doing right now, and I wouldn’t change a thing. I love uncomfortable situations. I like to throw myself into things and places that are unknown, and get lost. But am I really lost? Can you be lost if you don’t know where or when you will find something? I don’t know where I’ll be 5 months from now, let alone 5 years from now. All I know is that I made one of the biggest decisions of my life one year ago, and I haven’t looked back.
To all my friends and family that saw me grow in Chicago, and New York, and to all the wonderful people in Los Angeles that have welcomed me into their lives: Thank you for helping mold me into who I am today, and for all the endless support. Keep smilin’ and Go!
This is my UNSCRIPTD Journey,